The Republican party is an abusive alcoholic promising things will be different

From a comment on the Cesca blog. This is brilliant. And true.

The Republican party is an abusive alcoholic promising things will be different if we just ignore the bloody and bruised face and let them back in the house.

They're sorry they weren't conservative enough for the Tea Party. They're sorry they ran up trillion dollar deficits in trying to systematically squeeze New Deal programs and liquidate the U.S. government, baby.

They were just foolin' around with that whole torture thing. Just having some fun, is all. Just some frat house hazing, sheesh. They wouldn't treat human beings like animals... unless they're pickin' cotton.

Joke! Just kidding. So sensitive. They love black people. Clarence Thomas and Michael Steele are on their side. And homosexuals aren't evil abominations of nature, they're just making an evil life choice and destroying American moral fiber. And women...especially when they're in the kitchen making babies who'll oversee the cotton picking. Joking! Gosh. Really sensitive. Is it that time of the month, America?

Don't make them sorry they apologized!

...
C'mon. Give us one more chance. We can prove we'll be more conservative than Bush and Cheney(long live tax cuts!). CPAC only applauds Dick because he's old and doesn't have too many more heart attacks left. They hardly mean it.

Whatya say, baby? We're really, 'burp', sorry.

This sad little story and chapter of American history has to end with a restraining order